Reasons Why I Wanna Die

Society
Society is dying in terms of morality and turning into kindergardeners(edited)

Especially the United States and fandoms as well. Someone doxxed a girl over a game, people lives are being taken, and the people that make fun of the situation is using the humor to relieve their pain.(edited)

In reality they hold strong grudges against them, but decide to stay calm, they became immune to it.

Wars And Racism
Well? For wars and racism? They haven't stopped yet, xenophobia, white Supramacy, feminism and battles in other countries are still happening in this modern era.

My Country
What if I look at my country only? Well nothing will change, we will forever be invisible except for that tower we'll build.

My country is too small to be noticed, our neighbors indonesia and thai get all the attraction but we don't.

Everyone keep forgetting to visit our country just because of our culture and rules.

Even i myself don't like my country.

I hate patriotism, it's so stupid.

I don't like durian with rice, i don't like eating with my hands, i don't like sitting on the floor, i hate malay english, i hate there's a medium suicide rate.

Starting my own family.
I won't have one, I'm more likely the person to leave my children alone, and sometimes judge them for not being perfect enough.

I'm more likely to leave girls, or never even get a girl, look at the drama and genetics, do you think I'll have a stable family? Maybe I'll just give pain to another innocent non-existant being.

YouTube
It won't be fun, my brother may be right, YouTube won't be a stable job, those autistic fans will still stay and my channel will die and get beaten by popularity due to not being able to catch up with the advances in art, or by religious beliefs, maybe I would leave gacha and then go to games, but maybe I'd have no friends by then, maybe they'd all got a real job, and stopped talking to me and ghost me. If I start a network, I wouldn't handle it since it would be a side job. All that fancy.

Beliefs
Maybe all that belief influence would drive me a bit insane, feel disconnected and give me another reason to confront death.(edited)

Maybe I will continue to suffer for the next 6 painful years of shouting and neglection from my older siblings, maybe I would drop out of school. Maybe all my plans will fail and I would have a mental breakdown.